The Girl I Am...


I am the girl you'll first notice after the ... well.... 10th take.


I am the girl with the hefty laugh and the sunshine smile.

I am the girl who smiles with her eyes if she really smiles.

I am the girl who wish she liked sweats as much as jeans...but jeans are more comfortable.

I am the girl who will say she could care less about her hair, but spends 15 minutes blowdrying it because people say its pretty.

I am the girl who sits on her bed at night and contemplates her thoughts to God while stairing at her wall, but when seriously talking or listening, looks through the ceiling.

I am the girl who hides behind her grin well... but I am the girl who gives up trying to hide anything at all from those who care.

I am the girl who LOVES to rock out...but...

I am the girl who relates more to thoughtful music.

I am the girl who sees things colorful when everyone else see it gray, and I am the girl who sees things gray when everyone else sees them black and white.

I am a black and white kind of girl.

I am the girl whos first thought in the shower is, "Hey God..*pause* ... I love You too..."

I am the girl who writes letters to people who may never get them.

I am the girl who pours her soul out on paper.

I am short and perky, I suppose.

I am Blonde.

I am Wise because my Father in Heaven is Wise.

I am My Father's daughter...heh...

I am a friend of God.

I am a twinkling deep-blue-eyed soul.

I am Not always able to understand myself.

I am Understood by Jesus.

I am such a hopeful romantic that it drives my friends insane.

I am having a seriously hard time to typing out subtle lies about myself. But

I am More than just a conqueror.

I am screwed up without Jesus.

I am a cadillac girl.

I am a creative mind.

I am the kind of girl who loves more than she wishes to at times...but

I DO love, even when its hard.

I am a straight-up Jesus-girl.

I am saving my first kiss and my whole self for the man God has for me

I am struggling.

I am More than just a conqueror.

I am just as happy doing background work as I am in the front where everyone can see.

I am in love with the plan God has for my life.

I am in great desperation for God to keep me in my place.

I am the girl who feels rejected amidst admiring peers.

I am a loner in a lot of things

but

I am not afraid to point to God to share my heart.


I make so many mistakes, I could have a hard time living with myself.

but


I am NOT perfect.

I am the girl who cries over the memory of holding your hand.

I am the girl who gave up her childhood dream.

I know God will show me His dream for me.

I am the girl who cries with no tears.

I am the girl who writes songs about you that you'll never hear.

I am hurting.

I am dealing.

I am growing.

I am moving forward even though

I am the one who proposed the step back.

I love to talk to God out loud in my car.

I am not afraid to be real.

I am crazy, plain and simple.

I am fully convinced that you'd really go insane if you weren't crazy while living this life.

I am tired of feeling rejected.

but its okay.


I am turning 18 in a month.

I am becoming a woman I think I might become friends with.

I am so so so in love with my Savior, even when I have a difficult time to listen to HIM.

God, I'm so fricken screwed up.

God, "...thats okay."

I am a wave tossed in the ocean, a vapor.

Who are you, Lord that you are mindful of me? Who are you Jesus, that you care for me?

God, "...I AM."


I am not...
God, "But I Am."

But I'm not...
God, "But I AM."

God, "You are beautiful, Dear One, because I AM.

You are more than just a conqueror because I AM.

You are My chosen child because I AM.

You are of royalty because I AM.

You are in Love with Me because I AM first in love with you.

You are hurting because I AM.

You are moving forward because I AM.

You gave up your dream, but I AM giving you the desires of your heart.

You love to rock out because I AM your Rock.

You are the girl with the hefty laugh and the sunshine smile because I AM your joy and I AM the Sonshine in your smile.

You have a twinkling deep-blue-eyed soul because I AM your breathe of life. You breathe My Spirit.

You are wise because I AM wise.

You are Loving because I AM Love.

You have my Heart because I AM not only in your heart, but you are in MY heart.

you are sensitive because I AM sensitive to all things.

You deal because I AM dealing with you.

You are real because, My dear Child, I AM REAL.

you are because I AM.

AND I AM YWHW. I AM that I AM.

and My Child... I AM in love with you."






And so...

I am His.

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Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart Be acceptable in Your sight, O LORD, my rock and my Redeemer. Psalm 19:15