My heart was beating and the anticipation grew.
The speaker was speaking and my very core knew.
I was going to sign up for this trip. I would sign up for this trip.
Not a single amount of hesitation could stop me. Finances? God would provide.
…Strange. I always worry about finances.
But I knew that I knew that I knew I was definitely going to Mozambique.I was going on this trip.
I took the papers. I filled them out. I got accepted. I was in.
And the money came. All that I needed came in. I knew it would.
We started meeting. Over twenty of us were going to go.
Team building always starts a year out for us.
But then we got an email.
The airfare had skyrocketed and 1000 dollars extra per person was just too much.
After 6 months, the trip to Mozambique was off.
Another trip was offered in February of 2013. A small group was going to India.
We had first dibs but there were limited spaces.
I was upset and bummed. I REALLY wanted to go to Africa. I mean… really wanted to go.
India just didn’t interest me at all in comparison to what I had set my heart on.
Six months went by. I moved out and my roommate conveniently enough, has gone on every trip to India my church has made. And she’s also the designated trip administrator.
A conversation very similar to this transpired.
Roommate: So wait. Why don’t you want to go to India?
Me: I don’t know. I’m just really bummed about Mozambique.
Roommate: But… you have almost all the money you need to go. I mean. It’s not even yours! You’ll have to give it back anyway.
Me: …good point… It’s just … I really wanted to go to Mozambique!
Roommate: Well, I mean… God provided the money. It’s just sitting in the account. Why NOT go to India?
Me: ….yeah… Why not go to India? Okay. I’ll come.
Roommate: Yay!!! This is going to be so much fun!
When I made the decision to go, I asked God to give me a heart to do this trip and for the people.
I was reminded at how clearly I knew I was meant to go on “this trip” when they first opened it up to our church.
I knew the money would come and it did.
So many things have fallen through for me over the years I’ve wanted to move to Colorado Springs and do multiple internships out there, but that didn't happen. I did a pastoral internship that I planned to finish in its 2 year entirety at my own church and God moved me on after only one year. I wanted to move to York, England and work with the YWAM out there, but it never panned out. Recently, I even thought of moving to Columbus for church planting opportunities and a school of ministry but as you can guess...
Things I've tried to do or plan never seem to work out. Mozambique didn’t even work out.
I’m writing this post this morning knowing that in a few short hours I will be boarding a plane for New York with 10 other people (4 of which are from a different church. Haven’t I told you my heart for unity between churches? LOVE it!) And then from there, we will land in Delhi, India.
A couple of months ago I happened upon a random entry in one of my journals from 2010.
“Lord I know this is kind of a weird request but, would you provide the finances for me to go to India?”
It makes me chuckle now.
Last Saturday I sat with a handful of kids in their children’s church leading a lesson on how Jesus is our Guide. They had just finished their little notes of encouragement to give to me, (as the whole church had just presented me with cards and notes to encourage me when I was overseas) and from there I was able to explain how even if we think we’re going where God wants us to go, if it’s not what He has planned, He will guide us to what His will is like a shepherd guides his sheep with his staff. It’s comforting to us then, because we know that as long as we’re walking with Jesus, we can’t go wrong even when we’re off a little.
I then shared my story about how I knew I was meant to go on this trip but I thought it was going to be to Mozambique. But God knew the entire time that He was about to answer a prayer I had made 3 years before it would come true. He knew all the long I was never going to Mozambique on this trip. He’d always planned for India. He provided the finances for India. It figures that I wasn’t all that thrilled about it at first.
Don’t you love it? We ask God for something and forget about it. When God answers it, we complain about the inconvenience of it all.
But God knows and knew. All along, He knew.
So today at 5:30pm, I’ll be heading out for 2 weeks and 2 traveling days. I’ll visit the Taj Mahal this Saturday, thus fulfilling the beginning of my childhood dreams of seeing the 7 wonders of the world. I’ll pretend I’m Jasmine for a few moments when I’m there… just to honor the little girl I once was and the woman I’ll always be.
I’ll preach out of Psalm 27 and 2 Corinthians 3 and 4 while I’m there. It’ll be the first time I’ve spoken publicly since I was in training for it.
I’ll be loving on women and children and imparting my heart for Jesus and knowing Jesus and worshiping Jesus while I’m there. I’ll be praying over patients as we try to accomplish a total of 5 medical missions in Delhi, Dehradun and also in the slums. We’ll be equipping pastors and church members and encouraging them to press on and keep doing the work God has called them to do.
In my heart though, I know the greatest change is about to take place in me.
This is the first time something hasn’t fallen through.
This is God’s first big YES to me.
And I know it’s not just a yes about going to India.
It’s a yes about…
Well…. That’s for a different entry.
I’ll be back on the 6th of March, for anyone who’s interested. Until then, however, I won’t be writing here as I won’t be taking my phone or computer with me. That’s right, I’m unplugging. I’ll of course pick back up where I’ve left off, upon my return. (And I’ll have pictures too!)
If you’re interested in praying for us, please pray that we are healthy, that we can sleep and that God will shift things in our hearts and use us to bring the Kingdom there… and then here when we return. I’m sure anything else you pray for on top of that will be amazing too!
Grace and Peace,